Conflict Resolution – How to Change Somebody’s Mind
In this post, I will be talking about some practical tips to convincingly make your point and even get people who don’t think like you to agree with you.
Getting people to see your point and agree with you is a valuable skill. At one point or another, you will need to convince someone and get them on your side in an argument.
These are simple but effective traits you can employ to get people to win people over in an argument.
First of all, to communicate effectively, the best attitude to have is to:
- Be non-aggressive – people are generally more willing to listen to you if you are soft-spoken
- Don’t be argumentative – you don’t have to counter every point
- Be more passive than aggressive
The following are three tips for effective communication:
Express Uncertainty
But…how can you change someone’s mind when you haven’t made up yours?
This doesn’t seem like a winning strategy, but consider it: if someone you are arguing with believes your mind is already made up, they won’t be willing to reason with you.
If they do decide to reason with you, the chances are that they will be on the defensive.
Therefore, for someone’s mind to change, they must be persuaded that your mind can change.
Don’t Contest Every Argument.
Your aim shouldn’t be to defend your reasoning and oppose your counterpart’s opinion.
Rather, your goal should be to reason with your counterparts.
However, this doesn’t mean that you don’t contest arguments. Instead, it means that you don’t have to challenge every point.
You will come across as unreasonable if you contest a reasonable argument. Therefore, when your opponent makes a valid argument, cede the point rather than oppose it.
You might not agree with your opponent’s conclusion, but you don’t have to disagree with every reason they have for arriving at their decision.
Never (Rarely) State Your Disagreement
It is more important for the opposition to hear your points and reason with you than for you to defend your previous argument.
It might not look like you are winning the argument, but it is vital that you still come across as reasonable so that your contestant will not become defensive.
In the end, you must realize that you cannot change a person’s mind: only your opposer has the power to change his/her mind. If you try to change it, they will defend it.
So, you must let them come to their conclusion.
When they do change their mind, it is not you that changed it: you just convinced them to change it.
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